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Jokes Page

"She who laughs last,
laughs best!"

"Laughter is the
best medicine."

"Laugh and the world laughs with you, trip over a big bag of garbage and fall on the sidewalk breaking a bone or two and you fall alone!"

Advanced Joke One

"Welcome to Wife Mart!"
This is a joke about a difficult choice. Imagine a store where a man can buy a wife! In the end, it makes fun of men...
A store that sells wives opened where a man may go to choose a wife from among many women. The store has six floors, and the women increase in (1) positive attributes as the shopper (2) ascends. There is however, (3) a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a wife from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down, except (4) to exit the building. No stopping on any lower floors. A man went to the shopping center one day to find a wife. On the first floor, the women have jobs. The man read the sign and said, "Well, that's better than my last girlfriend, but I (5) wonder what's further up?" So, up he went. On the second floor, the women have jobs, love sports, and drink beer. The man smiled to himself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" The third floor has women who have jobs, love sports, drink beer, and are extremely good-looking. "Hm, better!" he said. "But I wonder what's upstairs?" The fourth floor has women who have jobs, love sports, drink beer, are extremely good-looking and do all the housework. "Wow!" (6) exclaimed the man, "Very (7) tempting. But there must be more, much more, further up!" He (8) headed up another (9) flight. On the fifth floor, the women have jobs, love sports, drink beer, are extremely good-looking, do all the housework and don't complain or (10) nag about anything. "(11) Hot damn! How close to perfect can you get?" the man said. "But just think what must be (12) awaiting me on the final floor." So, up to the sixth floor he went. The sixth floor has a sign that reads: You are visitor 133,956,779 to this floor. There are no women on this floor. This floor exists (13) solely as (14) proof that men are impossible (15) to please. Thank you for shopping Wife Mart, and have a nice day. (1) good things they have or do

(2) goes up

(3) a limit or a small problem

(4) to go out

(5) to think

(6) to say loudly or with excitement

(7) it makes him want to try

(8) to start to go up

(9) one set of stairs

(10) ask her husband many times to do many things

(11) this expression shows excitement

(12) waiting for

(13) only

(14) showing that something is true

(15) to make and keep happy

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